Grammar Check Walks the Plank

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Finger puppet of a skeleton i pirate hat and eye patch

Pirate Finger Puppet (from Logan) by Uncle Catherine CC 3.0 http://www.flickr.com/photos/_cck_/3288134081

Help! Pirates have taken over my computer!

I am a terrible speller. I remember a poster my 6th grade teacher had on the wall: Yes, spellling is important. It took me all year to figure out why everyone thought it was so funny. Can I blame that on bad eyesight?

Bad eyesight or not, I rely on Spell Check more than I ought. However, I do know that it’s more of a double-check than the final word. The same goes for Grammar Check. My characters speak colloquially, which really pisses my Grammar Check off. All those fragments! Subject and verb disagreements left and right.

Apparently, my Grammar check is trying to get me back.

The original phrase:
…there was a row of mailboxes with hand scrawled names taped to the metal doors.  

The Grammar Checked phrase:
…there be a row of mailboxes with hand scrawled names taped to the metal doors.

Arrrg, matey!

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7 thoughts on “Grammar Check Walks the Plank

    • But if I turn off grammar check, I’ll never find out what grade level I write. Turns out it’s 3.8.

      My average paragraph has 2.6 sentences in it. My average sentence has 9.1 words. And my average word has 4.3 characters.

      How’s that for useless information?

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