You Know You’re A Writer (or Paranoid) When: Mail

One of those mail center mailboxes at the end of some suburban cul-du-sacs. The boxes are upended, dented and torn apart and one door is hanging open.

2009/365/33: Drinking and Picking Up Your Mail Do Not Mix by cogdogblog CC 3.0

Let’s say that when you come home from work you normally bring in the mail. Not that your household assigned this task to you. It just evolved to be yours. You kind of like it.

What happens when, two days in a row, you check the mail only to find nothing? It wasn’t a weekend or two mail carrier holidays in a row…yet no mail. No bills, no coupon fliers, no solicitations, no catalogs.

Does your mind automatically jump to figuring out who could be stopping your mail and why? Do questions like “am I getting a package someone else wants” or “was my mail box coincidentally chosen to be the drop off for some illegal shipment” pop into your head? Do you wonder how difficult it would actually be to stop someone else’s mail? Do you consider the possible reasons someone would want to, namely to make it look like you were home when you could actually be dead?

And then (when you find out that your husband actually got the mail) do you think that, perhaps, you should read fewer mystery/thrillers and watch fewer cop dramas?


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