Mediums That Scare Me

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Creative Commons license: https://www.flickr.com/photos/matins/6697266793/in/photolist-bcPf68-6yDLf-aZkcyH-4vADtN-4vAD4W-4wRv2u-4uSJ4U-4u7PGz-cn62F1-4qMHP2-2WWDqU-4qjF3v-4sGLUK-4vADFA-4saYaa-4wMn7V-4w2Lr6-4k72N6-dzSDzN-47wKPo-4saY1a-4egUXt-4tuJ8G-4VeDFg-4u7PNM-4w2KtK-61HuYk-4u7Eat-59uxki-4wWdRT-4nyNuS-4ftqoL-5m3fty-4fV96y-hWaZyJ-4sLQkw-4jz9hF-dqXHbf-dqXH8m-dqXHew-dqXy24-dqXHcG-dqXHhC-dqXy3i-dqXxXV-4pJsJt-5uCETp-dqXH9E-4v3eRU-4offci

Jazz Hands “Spiritual Advisor” by mmatins – Flickr Creative Commons

Not that kind of medium.

I’ve been watching the World Cup, emailing cheers with friends in the Netherlands and texting anxiety with friends here at home.

The recent US-Belgium game got me thinking of the summer I was an exchange student in Bruges. I had a great time and suddenly, despite the heartbreak loss, I wanted to reach out to my host sister. We’d lost contact fairly soon after my return…nearly twenty years ago. I found her online (God bless the internet). Then I got cold feet. I had her email, but what did I say?

Letters do that me. Cards do that to me. Any sort of well wishing (the signable frame at weddings, a friend’s cast, you name it) does that to me.

I panic. I want to get the words and sentiment just right.

I can write chapters upon chapters about characters spiraling into insanity or contemplating a revenge murder, but a little “hey, how are you” or “best wishes on this next great adventure” paralyzes me.

Yes, I realize that it’s what’s behind the writing rather than the medium itself that’s tripping me up, but it’s still frustrating. The card is so small. An email is so casual.

I suppose a blank page is a blank page no matter what.

 

I’m posting early because: Hup Holland!

 

Curse of the Cards

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Most of my friends know that I write. This is great when say that I’m writing over the weekend because they don’t question it. But it’s also a curse because I hate, HATE sending cards and signing guest books at weddings.

I always feel a huge pressure to write something moving or witty or memorable. But in the moment, I freeze and can’t think of anything. When I do come up with something it’s usually overwrought or incredibly stilted. Bleck.

The simple answer would be to come up with something beforehand, but I never do. I have no real explanation other than I’m acting like an ostrich at the first sign of trouble.

Anyone else have this problem? Or maybe you LOVE stretching your writing muscles on card? If so, I envy you!